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Blind Dates

By: Emma Jones - Updated: 11 Oct 2012 | comments*Discuss
Blind Date Date Set Up Dating Set Up

When your mum tells you your Aunt Frances has met the perfect person for you, you might well be a bit sceptical. People are always trying to set up singletons. Whether it’s the well meaning married couple, the mother desperate for grandchildren or the patronising boss – they all think they know what’s best for you.

When to Agree to Go

If you don’t try it you’ll never know if you like it – it’s true. Sometimes it’s worth giving something a shot – what have you got to lose?

Like any dating though, don’t go if you are not ready. If you’ve just had a difficult break up or are still grieving a relationship, don’t let people push you into something you are not ready for. Similarly, if you are perfectly happy being single and not looking for a date, don’t let any do-gooders convince you otherwise.

How to Prepare

Usually with a blind date, someone will have set you up, so milk all the information out of them you can. Find out about your date’s background, what they like, where they work – anything that will give you an insight into who this person is. It can also be helpful to talk on the phone before you meet. This will establish a connection and make you more relaxed when you actually meet in person.

Where to Meet

A person stands outside a lowly cinema with a red rose on their lapel waiting desperately to catch sight of their betrothed. OK, so life is not an old movie, but it does help to have a way of recognising each other. Pick a location that isn’t too crowded and be specific about what you will be wearing or distinctive features such as a beard or glasses. Now, the likelihood is your date will not turn out to be a mass murderer but it is better to be safe than sorry so pick a public venue for your first date.

What if it’s Really Bad

Sometimes, people might think they know what’s best for you but they really don’t. If you are sat staring at your date wondering how on earth your well meaning acquaintance thought this was your ideal match, then you need a get out of jail free card. The temptation is to have a friend call you and give you an excuse to leave but really this is disrespectful both to your date and the person who set you up. You need to stick it out for as long as possible, so you can make an excuse about an early start and leave early.

How Not to Offend the Person Who Set You Up

Now obviously the person who set you up thought you were a match made in heaven, so they might be disappointed you thought your date was as interesting as watching paint dry. Here is the point at which being tactful is a great skill to possess. It is best not to be entirely honest but just to say you had a lovely time but don’t didn’t feel a connection. Try to leave it at that, but if they push you, be firm about the fact you don’t wish to date them again, but vague in your reasoning.

There's nothing to say that a blind date can’t be the start of a beautiful relationship, so give it a go with an open mind. Many successful marriages have started this way and sometimes your friends do know what’s best for you. If it doesn’t go well though, put it down to experience - you only regret the things you don’t do, not the things that you do.

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